29 Sep What being sober for 16 months has taught me!
For years, alcohol was part of my life. It shaped my weekends, my friendships, and even my identity. But on the 30th of May 2024, I had my last drink; and what started as “let’s see if I can last a year” turned into a complete lifestyle shift.
In this week’s episode of The Seamus Evans Show (embedded below), I open up about my journey with addiction, sobriety, and what life feels like almost two years alcohol-free.
Why I Finally Quit Drinking
I’ve been a binge drinker for most of my adult life. Like many Aussies, drinking wasn’t just an activity, it was part of the culture. Birthdays, weddings, weekends, everything revolved around alcohol. But what began as “normal” eventually cost me more than just money.
I lost friendships, jobs, opportunities, and I spent too many mornings battling shame, regret, and crippling hangovers. Doctors even warned me about my liver health in my twenties, telling me my liver looked like that of someone twice my age.
The moment that really shook me was asking myself: “How do I stop drinking?”, and realising I didn’t know the answer. That’s when I knew something had to change.
Early Struggles with Sobriety
The first three to six months were brutal. I didn’t just miss alcohol, I missed the ritual of it, the glass of wine on a Friday, the beers with mates on a Saturday. Without that crutch, I felt anxious, restless, and honestly, a little lost.
I replaced the habit with chocolate, nicotine, and soft drink, not perfect solutions, but they got me through the cravings. I also went to AA briefly, where I cried my way through the first meeting, too embarrassed to even speak. By the second week, I shared my story. And I haven’t been back since. I know AA works for a lot of people. But it just made me sad, most of the people there had horror stories and I just didn’t want to be in that environment. I felt I needed positivity and happiness to keep my motivated through the start of this journey. I believe in surrounding yourself with people who lift you up. I felt AA brought me down.
For me, sobriety couldn’t be about saying “never again.” That felt too daunting. It had to be about one day at a time.
What Helped Me Stay Sober
1. Avoiding social pressure early on
At the start, I skipped parties and drinking environments. My “arm” was weak, too easy to twist. Over time, that muscle strengthened, and I learned to confidently say no.
2. Secretly building momentum
Instead of announcing it to the world, I stayed quiet about my decision until I already had three months under my belt. That way, when I told people, I could say, “I’ve already been sober for 90 days.” That changed the narrative from “good luck” to “wow, that’s an achievement.”
3. Replacing addiction with healthier habits
I became addicted to something else, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Training 5 days a week and hitting the gym gave me a similar rush, I used to find in drinking. Not the same. But I can definitely see a correlation between the two stress relievers.
4. Focusing on the positives
My mental health is TEN TIMES BETTER!! I have more energy, increased productivity. I even have More money. A much happier me all round.
What Sobriety Has Taught Me
1. It costs more than money. If drinking is costing you friendships, opportunities, or your health, it’s already too expensive.
2. The journey is complex. Addiction isn’t black and white. Everyone’s story looks different.
3. Identity matters. You’re not just “someone who hasn’t had a drink in X months.” You can change your identity to “someone who doesn’t drink.” That’s a powerful shift.
4. Small wins beat big declarations. Saying “never again” can backfire. But stacking small wins every day builds a lifestyle you don’t want to lose.
Final Thoughts
If I could go back to my 18-year-old self, I’d whisper: Don’t start drinking. There’s nothing at the bottom of the bottle.
Sobriety has given me clarity, energy, and the drive to chase my dreams harder than ever. And while I still miss a glass of wine every now and then, I don’t miss the regret, the hangovers, or the cost to my health and happiness.
This is just the beginning of unpacking my story with sobriety, and I’ll continue sharing what I learn as the journey evolves.
If you’re sober, curious, or thinking about making a change, I’d love to hear from you in the comments. What’s your story? What has sobriety or moderation taught you about life?
✅ Listen to the full podcast episode above.
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